Before I forget

This is how it went. I am terrified of having kids. I am terrified that they wouldn't respect me, because I have nothing to show for my life, that once I have them, I will be the mom, the person in the supporting role without a real story of her own, that if I can't be the lead in my life today, then I couldn't possibly be the lead when I have two kids, not true of course, but why can't I of course do it just now then? So he asked me, what will make me comfortable with the idea of having kids? This is what I (we) discovered. I want to make one undeniable difference, one piece of work which can't be forgotten in the day-to-day, its not a lifelong endeavor, maybe 5-7 years, maybe less. I will repeat it, in my own time, but first the first one. This is how I do things. I can deliver with spurts of concentrated energy. 5 or 7 years is a spurt compared to a lifetime. I have been trying to identify that one skill I should dedicate my life to, but that is not me, not yet. What will my project be? A book? A monument? A painting? A school in Africa? An invention?  A business? Climbing a mountain?