I want to tell you why I chose you, not in an instant, but over those first few years. It is true that I noticed the radiant you immediately when we met in Syracuse, but I didn't choose you because of it. In fact, the first thing my brain told me when I saw you that day was "no need". But when you chose to engage with me, with an interest that other people did not display, it told me you were open minded, it told me, with him, being seen as an equal is a possibility--you weren't being patronizing or just kind.
Your intelligence and your ability to say interesting things, I took almost for granted, because those are things I have found in others at least to the extent that it brings me pleasure, and no one who didn't meet those standards was ever even going to fall under my radar. That said, as we spent more time together, I realized I was having a lot of fun just being with you and that is rarer, though again not something impossible to find in others.
And then there were your thoughtful actions, like picking me up from the airport with the bee balloon saying "bee mine", I never had anyone express the fact that they cherished me that way before. The effect was dampened by some of your more thoughtless actions quite soon after, but, as a man, the fact that you even had the capacity to be that thoughtful was entirely new to me. Though, now, I also get the meaning of the words love me little, love me long... it's not about the grand gestures, it's about consistency. Anyhow, you still got brownie points for it.
But the big one, which you know, ultimately, was your willingness to communicate, your insistence that we communicate. Again, I didn't know how sincere you were about it, and I have questioned the intentions behind your words many times, but even to have that option for an open channel for dialogue at all times was a big deal. And you never quit on it, I can say that with 100% confidence.
Your faith makes me want to reinvest in us.
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